As a child, I was blank but brave. I was weak but workaholic. I was destructive but creative. I don't know about you, but this was me. I could pour away the milk just so I could use the tin to create my first convertible sports car. Great!!!
As a child, my first words were wrongfully mentioned, yet I spoke them. Today I cannot pitch my ideas to the right people because I'm afraid they'd judge me. As a child, my legs weren't strong, yet I stood to walk. Today I say my resources are inadequate so I must wait until I have enough. As a child, my first alphabet couldn't be recognized, yet I wrote it. Today I feel I don't know enough and so I can't write my own books. As a child, my first song was a mess but I sang it. Now I'm afraid of failing so I can't start a small business.
Where did I learn to be afraid?
I ask this because when I was a child, I wasn't afraid of failure; of making mistakes; of trying! Where then did I learn this self-killing
If you thought that at the end of this write-up I'll give you a response, then sorry. Because honestly, I know not the right answer. I just know that at the other side of fear is freedom. If I can abandon my fears, then I'll be a free man. I'll be free to invent; free to compete; free to try. My fears keep my abilities in a shell. Once I am afraid my ideas can never be hatched, my dreams can never manifest, my concepts can never be concrete.
Today I want to face my fears and defeat them. I want to be brave again, courageous, forward-looking. I want to accept that success is more than just a possibility. I want to believe again that I am able, I'm strong, I'm a genius! I want to speak again, invent again, and fight again. Just like old times.
I will face my fears, fight them, and defeat them.
Still, where did I learn to be afraid?
By Cryspin Kavaarpuo.